Sunday, September 8, 2013

screaming inside!

I am just screaming inside and wonder if anyone really cares, but maybe they just don't see. My heart is constantly breaking. There is a worry that never ends. there is a big hole that can't be filled. I don't want to sound ungrateful cause I not! I have been blessed with so many people who love me. But can they really see, do they really even want to know? can they see the pain that is there everyday? Can they see my life falling apart? Can they see the walls being built up around me so I won't get hurt and the ones of comfort and peace being torn down and I can't stop them? Do they see the pain of every peice of clothing every paper every box that is filled? Do they not see that I just need out! That I can't do it anymore! Cant they see that I am going to break! That I am going to crumble? Why am alone? Why aren't they here? I am not writing this for everyone to come running! I am not writing this to make anyone feel bad for me. These are just the thoughts going through my head. I love that I have been blessed with what I have I am greatfull for the strength I have to endure this life.